Indie title lambasted by peers for lack of 8-bit graphics and chiptunes

Eight pixels? God what a sellout…

Fitzy Pushka is an indie game unlike any other, and because of that it seems to be making waves in the gaming world. Development studio We Make Games Inc. have received bundles of criticism and hate mail from fellow indie developers for failing to include the genre’s requisite 8-bit low-quality graphics and chiptunes made by a 17-year-old high school dropout from Los Angeles.

“We just want to make video games,” said lead developer Oliver Woodsman, in a blinding display of obviousness. “We thought, hey, maybe if we use technologies better than what 1995 offered, we could do something new in the genre. It’s not like we’re pushing the envelope anywhere else either, Fitzy Pushka has all the other necessary components of an indie game! We’ve got a pay-what-you-like pricing structure, a devteam who hates Japanese games while taking inspiration from them, a name which names absolutely no sense and a genre which can best be described as a “fusion” of RPG/RTS/SHMUP/FPS. But apparently including more than sixteen colours in your game means you’ve “sold out” and now we should be taking contracts with EA!”

We reached out to King of all Indie Developers Edmund McMillen of Team Meat, who stated that “Woodsman thinks he’s all that, breaking tradition. Well he isn’t. Honestly, how hard would it have been to just pick at least one of the two? We go with low-fi graphics and apparently we’re the second coming of Christ, so no-one cares that our music is decent and catchy. But I mean, their title isn’t even masocore, so I don’t know how they think they’re going to be even remotely competitive in the market.”

Other developers have been less than complementary, with Mojang claiming that Woodsman is “worse than Riccitiello”, Level 5 stating that “I wouldn’t even wish Origin on them” and 2D Boy saying something similar, because that’s how independent video game development works.

About Cieran Douglass

Cieran built this website in a cave with a bunch of scraps. Actually no that's not right at all, it was with Wordpress and middling Photoshop and design skills. He often plays video games and his favourites are Paper Mario TTYD, GTA San Andreas, Portal 2 and Minecraft. His display picture is not an accurate portrayal. He currently works for a much bigger website at the University of York, but if you'd like him to write something for you he can be contacted at