Man creates game, is suddenly industry-leading expert

The App Store: Your shortcut to credibility and being listened to

Ryan Gould was a man with a dream, a dream to create a game which sold “at least ten” copies on the iOS App Store, and with it came the fame and prestige allocated to such a notable position.

“It’s fantastic” said Gould in an interview he demanded that we have with him, “because I’ve made a game, suddenly my opinions matter! It doesn’t matter that it took me half an hour and was built using all the Java I learned in my first five weeks as a computer science student at the University of Bedfordshire, I’m a publisher now, and when I say things or tweet things, Kotaku writes about me!”

Gould is rapidly approaching being one of the most quotable developers in the media industry, with his opinions such as “the future is in microtransactiontransactions”, “the up button is overrated” and “We have A and B, why not have C?” being discussed far and wide on discussion forums across the web.

Leading analyst Michael Pachter is rumoured to be considering giving up his position at Wedbrush-Morgan and slots on GTTV in favour of Gould, as Pachter’s never having developed a game is seen as clearly detrimental to his efforts as a leading industry expert.

Gould is unrepentant about his success. “My opinions matter just as much as the next guy. Though admittedly the next guys are Zynga and Rovio…”

When one surprised commenter on Destructoid pointed out that Gould had slapped together a game which sold sixteen copies in two weeks in order to stave off having to do his coursework, they were shouted down by hoards of other angry commenters claiming that “if you can’t make games then your opinion is moot”, which certainly gives us some insight into how the modern gaming news media works.

About Cieran Douglass

Cieran built this website in a cave with a bunch of scraps. Actually no that's not right at all, it was with Wordpress and middling Photoshop and design skills. He often plays video games and his favourites are Paper Mario TTYD, GTA San Andreas, Portal 2 and Minecraft. His display picture is not an accurate portrayal. He currently works for a much bigger website at the University of York, but if you'd like him to write something for you he can be contacted at